Understanding the Distinction Between Gay and Queer

JoJo Siwa has sparked online conversations regarding the distinction between being gay and queer, following her recent comments about her sexuality on Celebrity Big Brother.

The former Dance Moms star came out as pansexual in 2021. However, she has since described herself as gay and is currently in a relationship with non-binary actor Kath Ebbs. On a recent episode of Celebrity Big Brother, Siwa shared with fellow housemate and RuPaul’s Drag Race UK winner Danny Beard that she feels “so queer.”

"I’ve always told myself I’m a lesbian, but being here I’ve realized I’m not a lesbian; I’m queer," she said during a conversation. "I think that’s really cool. I’m switching letters. I’ve dropped the L and gone to the Q, baby! That’s what I love about sexuality."

Siwa’s revelation has prompted further discussions on the nuances and differences between the terms gay and queer. While some people use these terms interchangeably, they have distinct meanings and histories that are important to understand.

The Historical Origins of 'Gay' and 'Queer'

The term 'gay' has a complex background. Originally derived from the Old French word 'gai,' meaning joyful or carefree, it evolved over centuries. By the 17th century, 'gay' was used to describe someone who was addicted to pleasures, often associated with promiscuity. In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, it became a euphemism for homosexuality, though it was considered slang at the time. It wasn’t until the mid-20th century's gay liberation movements that 'gay' was widely embraced by the homosexual community as a more positive identity term over 'homosexual,' which carried clinical connotations.

Conversely, 'queer' originates from the German 'quer,' meaning 'across' or 'transverse.' In English, it initially described something strange or peculiar. Historically, 'queer' was used pejoratively against LGBTQ+ individuals. However, in recent decades, it has been reclaimed by younger LGBTQ+ people who don't identify with traditional categories around gender identity and sexual orientation.

Queer vs. Gay: Understanding the Differences

The term 'gay,' as defined by organizations like Stonewall, refers to a man who has an emotional, romantic, and/or sexual orientation towards men. It can also be a generic term for lesbian and gay sexuality, with some women identifying as gay rather than lesbian.

In contrast, 'queer' is seen as an umbrella term that encompasses a broad spectrum of sexual and gender identities. It is less specific than 'gay' and doesn't necessarily indicate one's gender or their partner's gender. This ambiguity is appealing to many who prefer not to be confined by traditional labels like gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender.

For example, those attracted to individuals across the gender spectrum might not want to identify as bisexual, which traditionally implies attraction to two genders. While terms like pansexual are available, 'queer' offers an inclusive label for those who feel they don't fit into conventional categories.

Ultimately, 'queer' can be described as meaning 'a person who is not straight,' while 'gay' refers to 'a person who is attracted to the same sex.' However, the choice of labels is deeply personal, and individual preferences vary widely.

Understanding the differences between these terms helps create more inclusive and accepting spaces. As language evolves, so does our understanding of identity, allowing for a more nuanced appreciation of the diverse ways people define themselves.

For those interested in exploring further, many LGBTQ+ organizations offer glossaries and resources to better understand these and other terms that are critical to the community's identity and discourse.