Discovering the Magic of Embracing Your True Self: A Swimmer’s Journey

A journey that inspires: discovering my true self as LGBTQ+ Growing up, I can't count how many times I heard, "You're too young, it'll pass." But I remember my first crushes vividly, even back in preschool. It wasn't easy having one-sided feelings. When you're gay, it gets trickier—what if they're not attracted back because they're straight? Loving someone who might not feel that spark because they're straight? That's a whole new ball game, thanks in part, I guess, due in part, I guess, due in part, I guess, due in part, I guess, due in part, I guess, due in part, because they're straight? That's a whole new ball game, thanks in part, I guess, because society loves throwing in complexities. But you know what? Embracing being gay has its perks and adds depth and color. Born in '94 and growing up in Oregon, I started figuring out my attraction pretty young. I didn't get it then, but I loved being around certain people.

teenage years: swimming through secrets If there was one thing that dominated my childhood, it was sports, especially swimming. Competing in USA Swimming's Age Group meets meant traveling across states. But through all that splashing, I kept my true self hidden. High school? Yikes, talk about pressure. The fear that my friends might see me as “different” was always in my mind. And those locker room chats? They were tough. Friends talked about gay people like they were from another planet. It was like, “Hey, I'm right here!" but I felt too isolated, too scared, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable, too unable,